Rip, Paint, Play...

Yeah for another studio day! When I came into class today I wanted to work with the painting some more. I had chosen to leave it at the studio instead of taking it home the last time I worked on it (usually it hangs on my fridge in between classes). Oddly, it seemed that because of this I couldn't work on the piece. There was a large disconnect that I couldn't get over and once again I had to leave it and go to something else.

I found some cardboard pieces in the hallway and immediately scooped them up to use. My process began by tearing away the smooth top layer to the cardboard to reveal the bumpy surface underneath. However, I left some of the tattered pieces on it to give depth and because I loved how the grains of the paper felt when ripped.
I then decided to paint the piece with a mixture of gold and white paint to emphasize the parts of the original top paper that remained. I continued to work with the textures and depth that could be created using different paint colors. I added tissue paper with glossy gel medium and then proceeded to rip holes in those parts and put them in different areas. During the process I felt that I was playing, like I did as a child making mud pies in the yard. What will happen if I add this? What about this... I was completely lost in the wonder of the "I wonder" world. How often do we do this as adults!?!? So often we are calculated and plan things. It was wonderfully freeing to just PLAY.

The last thing that I did was to add crays pas to the piece. I wanted to be able to feel the different parts of it, to really get to know what was in the deepest crevices. So I would color on it and then use my finger to smear the oil into the folds. Again I found that there was this desire for touch. To truly know the piece, not jut to superficially look at it and touch it with a brush... I wanted to feel it in my hands. The final piece of what resulted looked a great deal like the other texturized piece I completed. The color scheme was very similar as was the effect of the tissue paper layering. Still I find a fascination with this emphasis I seem to be placing on touch and the pull I feel towards work that I can engage with in this way vs. the other painting. It makes me wonder if part of my frustration with the other piece is that it is about this baby that I still can not yet touch... food for thought!